The case against a NFL team in L.A.

Thanks, but no thanks

 

Sam Farmer of the L.A. Times has produced another of his many many columns about the possibility of a new stadium in the greater Los Angeles area and therefore the possibility of one or more NFL teams moving into this stadium.  It features a pretty slide show and, if you like stadium design, I highly recommend you follow the link and indulge in some stadium porn.

As an old boss of mine told me, however, masturbation is nice, but it doesn’t make a baby.  Do you know how many of these drawings and renderings have been created over the years?  The concept of a stadium in L.A. has kept architectural firms, CAD specialists, animators, and office analysts specializing in PowerPoint presentations healthily employed since the 1980s.  Shit, Sam Farmer has been fucking this chicken for as long as he has been a columnist at the Times.

IT IS NOT GOING TO FUCKING HAPPEN!

Here are the reasons why:

1 – The L.A. market only supports winners.  Franchises like the Clippers were only able to survive because the NBA is set up so that teams can suck and still make money.

2 – We already have two football teams.  They are called USC and UCLA.  And we barely support them when they suck.  USC used to give away tickets back in the old days of Paul Hackett.  The reason they didn’t go away during the lean years is because they are tied to the universities’ funding streams.

3 – We do not want to spend tax-payer money to subsidize billionaires.

4 – We vote people out of office that pledge to spend tax-payer money to subsidize billionaires.

5 – All of the teams considered to be candidates to move suck monkey balls.

6 – Everyone in L.A. is from somewhere else.   We will only go to games that feature our teams.  The season ticket fanbase consists solely of corporations willing to buy tickets to shmooze clients.  Clients don’t want to waste their Sunday afternoons going to a game featuring a shitty team.   How many clients are you going to get by taking them to a Raiders-Jags game?

I could go on, but I think you get my point.  Truth be told, I only wrote this post because I can’t stand seeing Tebow’s smiling mug when I log in to see if any of you fuckers wrote something new.  Blame Tebow!

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