Open Complaint Thread

It feels like there’s been a lot of grousing about things lately–and likely for good reason–but I figure we may as well make an official thread for recent complaints and any other things you need to yell into the cloud (SEE WHAT I DID THERE?!?!).

Personally, I’m tired of people basing important decisions on beliefs that are not steeped in any sort of rational or fact-based basis, especially to the extent that they will deny evidence presented to them. I kept myself awake the other night thinking of ways I would explain homeopathy to hippie coworkers–look at how many decimal places these dilutions get, and by the way have you heard of Avogadro’s number?–DESPITE no hippie coworkers even mentioning homeopathy. I just loathe that stupidity can take hold so strongly that intelligence is ignored. This is a very general frustration, but only because there are so few places that I can escape it.

Especially troll Patriots fans who wouldn’t know evidence if they pooped it out and ate it and then had a second chance to see it when they pooped it out again. All I’m saying is that Underball space docks with his fleshlight before practicing oral sex on it.


55 thoughts on “Open Complaint Thread

  1. Is this where I complain that I didn’t get a gig at KSK in the last round but Johnny Sugar did?

    Shake harder, boy.


  2. I saw Fury Road this morning. I am a bit ashamed to say that I chortled when I saw the group of large women being milked.


  3. Two movies I think everyone should watch re: beliefs are Safe with Julianne Moore (incredible and still timely movie), and The Master with Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Joaquin Phoenix.


  4. Underball won.

    He has infected our safe place with his (and the Patriots) ME ME ME attention whoring.

    Fuck. Tom. Brady.


      1. /Goes to give Make It Snow a high five
        ///head hits table

        And that’s how I came up with the idea for the Flux Capacitor!


      1. Unfortunately, CB seems to take things too seriously – and a little too personally. It’s interesting how he’s (I’m guessing) in his 40s, but is still new to the social norms online, which have never really changed.

        The best defense is a good offense and a good offense is ROLL TIDE


  5. While listening to the awesome playlist RTD put together on Spotify, I have come to realize how many of these classic songs are used in advertising shitty products. I hate the fact that I recognize songs because of this fact rather than the music standing alone.

    /Damn clouds


    1. Ugh, yeah. I especially hate getting a song stuck in my head because of a bad commercial. I keep threatening my brain with a q-tip lobotomy when it does this, but it doesn’t take me seriously and keeps torturing me in this way.


    2. Glad to hear someone else is enjoying that playlist – even it were just for me it would have been worth it; it’s a really solid selection of classic rock.

      Liked by 2 people

  6. OSZ, your comment about people basing decisions on beliefs that are not based in any fact-based evidence… this is exactly what religion and faith in God are. I can only speak to Christianity because that is my background, but after years of being a faithful church-going Christian, I have come to realize that the idea of an all-powerful God and a risen Christ just seem like utterly absurd concepts to me.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I like the basic concept of religion, but it should really just boil down to this

      That’s it. The extra rules, the demands on your time, the worship, the handing out money to crooks, the altar boy rape, the FUCKING MURDER, restrictions on what you can do or say because of other people’s sensibility, etc. GOTS TA GO.


      1. This. The concepts are about how to live your life the best way possible and are pretty consistent across all religions. It turns shitty when humans set up structures around them and abuse them for their own personal gain.

        Humans gonna human, though.

        Liked by 1 person

    2. Yeah, I had my walk away moment from Christianity about a week after I became a confirmed Presbyterian 20 or so years ago, after reading (of all things) The Tao of Pooh at age 14. Anymore, that’s such an omnipresent belief system that it’s almost hardly worth commenting on, and, besides, Scientology is the ONE TRUE RELIGION and I’ll tell you all about it for a thousand easy payments of $2,000 a day.

      Anymore, I’m more concerned about progressives and other intelligent people who think they’ve left the religion of their youth behind but are sold on other new forms of woo and snake oil. Portland is full of these people who buy into all sorts of “alternative” beliefs/diets/products/medicines/etc. Sherman Alexie was on Dan Savage’s podcast this week and there was a fantastic discussion (because it’s Sherman Alexie for fuck’s sake; the man is a hero) about non-Native Americans suddenly finding a new “Native American spirituality” as if it’s some amorphous woo-woo catch-all liberal thing, when a.) Native American religions are both specific and often quite conservative, and b.) most of these things people join are just non-Native ex-Christians still expressing the puritanical and flawed belief structures they exited, but just in some new way where THEY get to be in charge instead of the guy at the pulpit. So people do this same thing with medicine, with yoga, with protests, with restriction diets, etc. It’s still an expression of their guilt or self-recrimination or whatever they had to deal with growing up. One of my exes/good friends is still super Catholic, but she comes from the social justice/work with the poor/Jesuit side of the equation, and I can handle her beliefs way better than I can deal with all these people I know suddenly trying to make a living off of practicing Chinese medicine.

      I have no good segue to this, but naturopaths and restriction diets: fuck you. I have a friend who is on one of these, and they’ve started to introduce very specific things: they can have raw sugar, but not white sugar. They can have yogurt, but no other dairy. THIS DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE ON A CHEMICAL LEVEL UNLESS YOU BUY INTO THIS SHIT!

      Okay, damn, time to get to work.


      1. I don’t know if that shit is more prevalent in Portland but there is no shortage of people trying to sell snake oil in L.A. Holy shit!


  7. As for the influx of tainthurt Patriot lovers, it would probably help if KSK writers would stop writing incessantly about Ballghazi.

    But I’m sure that Uproxx loves the pageviews. Uproxx may even be demanding that Ape have his writers write about things that annoy us. Increase the pageviews, ruin the site. Circle of life, my friends. Circle of life.

    We’ll always have [Door flies open].

    OSZ, I know that I owe you an email. I’m sorry. This week has been busy as hell, including preparation for a job interview, among other things. I’m not ignoring you because I’m a bastard. My being a bastard is entirely separate from the fact that I’m ignoring you.


    1. No worries. I’ve been trying to keep my brain afloat while learning the new job, so I hardly noticed, and I figured you’d get back to me if you wanted to/when you had the time.

      Once things slow down, let’s meet up. I’ll buy you a beer. I know a place or two in Portland that serves it.


    2. I’m with BBR on the Patriots thing. I really think I need a break from KSK if it’s going to continue to be ALL PATRIOTS ALL THE TIME, even if it is to goof on them.

      And holy shit, now Uproxx Sports articles are showing up on the KSK page, and @KissMeSuzy is tweeting them too. And the comments in those articles are just as bad as you would expect.

      I love the newer writers (RFD, Spilly, Dave, Trevour), but I don’t see KSK maintaining its edge much longer. Also wonder how long Ape will want to work for Uproxx.



      1. I’m with BBR too. We’ll always have the klassics and hell, some of the recent stuff has been hilarious too.

        I’ve seen websites go through ups and downs. The future is pretty uncertain, but until Ape hangs up his banana and PFTC puts away his lunchpail….


    3. That’s the bane of the modern internet ad business. In order to bring in the most clicks, write sensationalistic pap that brings in the mouth-breathers. It’s pretty messed up, really, but the lowest common denominator seems to have become the majority. We’re reaching the point where Idiocracy may be an optimistic view of the future.


  8. You know what I’m sick of? These goddamed Apple Watch commercials. I’m not going to buy one, I expect to look down on anyone who actually does, and I am so fucking tired of that irritating twee music they play with all the ads. I swear it seems like there’s one during every single commercial break.


    1. Ugh. I’ve hated Apple’s TV ads since the iPad ones where they’re all “Hey it’s as thin as a pencil and you’re gonna go change the world by wearing brand new clothes made to look like Goodwill bins finds and thick framed glasses and taking your iPad to Nepal to lay down some sick beats and take selfies and they’ll worship you like a god since you own our technology!”

      Fuck the whole “silicon valley will change the world!” brand of egotistical assholism. They’ve changed it, all right, by pricing out the working class, the creative class, the poor, the struggling, and a whole helluva lot of minorities right out of liviable areas.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Ha, I love the implication on tablet/phone ads that they are keeping us all “connected” as a society when in fact it’s mostly people sitting on their couches staring at the glow-y light, ignoring everyone around them, likely with no pants on.

        The irony that I am posting this comment while staring at the glow-y light is not lost on me.


      2. This is a funny discussion. I just got an iPhone 6 because my contract was up, and so many people were telling me how awesome/life changing it is. Besides the various quirks in the UI, many of which haven’t figured out yet, and the camera (which is admittedly great), life has not changed, except for the loss of money buying the fucking thing. Also, I have no idea what Pebble watches and Uniqlo are. I will assume Uniqlo is A.w.e.s.o.m.e.-O’s cousin.


      1. “Apple iPager confirmed, will match your Uniqlo jeans” – Gizmodo

        “36 ways the iPager will change your life!” – Techcrunch

        “Apple iPager to be made entirely of platinum, will be a must buy for your midlife crisis.” – WSJ


      2. One final quick thought before a meeting: Apple is successful by taking tech that has been useful already and maximizing the user experience side of things. This was true with Jobs and is still true now (except now they’re just sort of following the crowd instead of banking on proven concepts). I’d say a good gauge of whether or not Apple’s products will be successful is to look at what they’ve been doing in Tokyo/Seoul for a while–before smartphones, the mobile market for in-phone services was huge there. The population density there requires smaller tech like smartbooks and tablets and phones rather than desktops and full laptops and such. Have they been using watches for tech? No, not really.

        So using that rubric, I can’t wait for Apple’s minidisc player to come out. Especially since I have all these minidiscs, still.


      3. I love my Pebble watch. Then again, I need to stay connected for work, so it makes things super easy. Instead of pulling my phone out, I just look at it to see if it’s something I need to deal with. Way less rude than fussing with your phone in front of someone. Also, prior to this, I never wore a watch.


      4. I still wear a watch (It’s a Timex!) and still use it to tell time. I keep my phone on my desk and check it periodically at work.


      5. @ballsofsteelandfury

        I’m just amazed that there isn’t a Uniqlo store in Portland yet. Seriously? We’re being colonized into Little San Francisco, Northwest Edition, and we can’t get that store? I wasn’t even slamming Uniqlo that much in that comment, more in how Gizmodo review (and photograph) stuff; I’ve actually wanted to try their jeans for year, but I’m worried that my cycling ass/thighs combo might not work with some of their cuts, and I’m damn sure not trying to figure that out via shipping and handling.


      6. The way I got introduced to Uniqlo was I was on vacation in Thailand and I ran out of underwear. I went to the mall (Pro tip: Bangkok malls are awesome and their food courts are some of the best places to eat) and went into the Uniqlo and found a pair that looked comfortable and roomy. They still are.


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