This week, I discuss an IPA from the brewing capital of the world . . . Utah? Away we go to the land of STRONG BEER TAEKS.
NAME: Hop Nosh IPA
SOURCE: Uinta Brewing Company, Salt Lake City, Utah; and the underground mines of honest, inbred, blonde, gullible, wholesome Mormons, presumably.
TYPE: India Pale Ale
REVIEW: Uinta is the best thing to come out of Utah since jazz . . . or, uh . . . Mormons . . . no, wait . . .
/Google image searches famous people from Utah
//Sees Beyonce picture
///Realizes Beyonce is from Houston
Beyonce! Now, I understand that many people don’t really like IPAs, that shitty brewers will add more hops to cover the imperfections in their beers, that brewing a good pilsner is the surest sign of brewing expertise, and so on and so forth. This shit is really good, though. It is an excellent combination of floral, citrus, pine and spice, and has a more than adequate bitterness you would expect in an IPA. The hoppiness is less overpowering than many IPAs that are on the market (or that guy who kidnapped Elizabeth Smart and forced her to be his burka-wearing sex-slave for a few years), and it is really easy to drink. I tried to figure out what type of hops are used, but a cursory two minute Google search yielded no results. Next time, I will use Bing.com. Anyway, at 7.3% ABV, it is the John Stockton to your sobriety’s Karl Malone, because it will ASSIST you in getting drunk quite nicely. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
What’s that? That’s a bad analogy? You’re right, but go fuck yourself. In conclusion, Beehive state.
BONUS MATERIAL: Last weekend, I went to the Beaver Creek Blues, Brews and BBQ festival in Beaver Creek, Colorado. My wife and I went to the beer fest part and drank way, way too much. I tried to note the variety of beers that I sampled in my phone. So for your enjoyment, here is that list in all of its glory. Yes, I was wasted. Yes, I still use “gay” as a pejorative term when wasted (and I just had to look up “pejorative” to make sure I was using it correctly), so I apologize in advance. And yes, the interlude was necessary, if not well translated from the iPhone to WordPress.
Oskar Blues – Pinner IPA
Copper Kettle – Mexican Chocolate Stout
Renegade -e3 Triple IPA
Mahogany Ridge – Cherry Ale
Grimm Brothers – German Red Ale
Great Divide – Rumble Vanilla Oak Aged IPA
Left Hand – introvert session ipa
Vail Brewing Company – IPA
Aspen Brewing Co – Independence Pass IPA
Fate – Pale Ale
Dam Brewery – Chili beer
Fate – Ryedorado
Crazy Mountain – pale ale
Durango brewing co. – black and blue – Dark lager and blueberry wheat ale
VBC – lime wheat
Grimm Bros – Kolsch
New Belgium – 1554
Strange Brewing Co – Grapefruit IPA
Dry Dock Lime Lager (balls)
Kannah Creek IPA – bueno
Grand junction – some brown shit
7 hermits – IPA
Dale’s Pale Ale
Grand Lake Woolly Bugger
Odd13 crazy double IPA bullshit
Breckenridge IPA – new decent
Copper Kettle – Charlie’s Stromg
Some gay shit